You do it when you talk to your friends, your family, your colleagues, and even the clerk in the grocery store; however, you may not be doing it in public speaking. What am I talking about? The pause. That moment in time when you stop speaking ever so briefly, categorize your thoughts, and take a quick supplemental breath.
The pause is something you should not time nor plan. The pause is something which should not occur every 4 - 5 words. (This is known as sing-song and is one of the best means of putting your audience to sleep.) And the pause is something the audience should not anticipate.
Recently, I held a voice and presentation skills workshop. In discussing public speaking, one of the participants said the words, "3 seconds." I knew right then and there that he was a member of Toastmasters because this organization has a delivery format which they urge their members to follow. Pauses should not be timed nor scripted. The pause is natural, normal, and invaluable when talking.
You may be under the mistaken impression that you are not allowed to pause when addressing an audience because of that old adage you learned as a child: do not take a breath until you come to some form of punctuation. That is not true. You can breathe almost anywhere in speaking.
[You were taught this lesson in the 2nd grade in order to read out loud smoothly. Wonderful. In the 2nd grade, there were only 6 words in your sentences! In the 12th grade, however, when you had 3 lines of sentence and no punctuation, you still believed you were not allowed to breathe.]
Because lack of air is something which is problematic when addressing an audience, the pause solves that dilemma. By supplementing your air supply before you run out of air - not when you are totally spent of oxygen - you will gain greater control over what is coming out of your mouth as well as your speed and your thought process. Pausing helps relax you.
The pause is also not just for you the speaker but also something necessary for your listeners. Whether you are in conversation or at the lectern, to be hit continually with non-stop verbiage is tiring for your listeners. They need the break just as you do.
Selasa, 14 November 2017
Senin, 16 Oktober 2017
Small Business Tips: These Are Not Terms of Persuasion! Double Your Convincing Skills Instantly
Most of us can hear the echoes of our parents, teachers, mentors, and coaches long after they pass from a position of great influence in our lives. This is natural and can be a good thing, or not. Not because sometimes we mimic what we've been exposed to and this is how bad habits become our normal M.O.
Years ago I had a business partner and both being strong personalities we often clashed on what course to take with clients. This set up frequent debates that would often leave me irritated and confused. I didn't mind the conflict, I relished it, but there was something about these exchanges that felt more coercive than persuasive. I started keeping a list of the terms that triggered this dynamic and found them used over and over in our conversations.
I eventually dissolved the partnership and while this list of mine was not the main factor it certainly created a less than congenial relationship that contributed to the split and made it easier. As the old saying about change goes, we change when the pain of not changing is greater than that of changing and that's exactly what happened. Once I'd moved on I had to laugh at how nice it was not to deal with this dynamic.
The words on my list with the scores next to each for usage counts? You need to, you better, you have to, you ought to, you must, you should. Innocuous enough, right? But try this on for size. An associate at work says you need to pay more attention to his project. What does your brain say non-verbally? In most people there's a bit of a rebellion going on. Really? I need to? I don't think so, bucko!
So you run into a friend whose been to a new, hot restaurant which you haven't been to yet. You should go to this place! Feel that? You should go? It almost sets up a "I couldn't care less" attitude. Of course, personalities vary and some people are perfectly comfortable with letting others dictate what they should do. But most of us are independent, self directed people.
So what do we replace these terms with when talking to ourselves (most important, real power shift takes place here, you no longer "need" to do something, you "want" to do something), our children, our employees, our mates (change the terms, change the dynamic, get your way more often), our customers and prospective customers? Simple. Try "you might want to" do something, "you might want to consider" something.
This is especially effective with teenagers and prospects, two groups ready to rebel or play devil's advocate at a moment's notice. "You might want to consider driving a little more carefully or your license might end up in jeopardy or at the very least your insurance might go up." That's friend to friend, not superior to inferior like this: "You need to shape up your driving. You better watch it or you're going to lose your license!" Whole different tone.
And with a prospect, "You need to move to the cloud!" Is just not going to get the same fair hearing that, "You might want to consider exploring the cloud, it might be something of value to you," will. The key is to present for consideration, not try to force something which almost always has a car lot negotiation feel to it. That's why we avoid car lots.
This is not to say that the aforementioned terms are not to be used, not at all. They're perfectly appropriate at times, without question. But when it comes to persuading someone to our point of view, you might want to consider leaving them out of the conversation. And when you do this with yourself, you shift the power from some unseen authority saying you "need" to get up and get to work you're now saying yourself that you "want" to get up and get to work.
Years ago I had a business partner and both being strong personalities we often clashed on what course to take with clients. This set up frequent debates that would often leave me irritated and confused. I didn't mind the conflict, I relished it, but there was something about these exchanges that felt more coercive than persuasive. I started keeping a list of the terms that triggered this dynamic and found them used over and over in our conversations.
I eventually dissolved the partnership and while this list of mine was not the main factor it certainly created a less than congenial relationship that contributed to the split and made it easier. As the old saying about change goes, we change when the pain of not changing is greater than that of changing and that's exactly what happened. Once I'd moved on I had to laugh at how nice it was not to deal with this dynamic.
The words on my list with the scores next to each for usage counts? You need to, you better, you have to, you ought to, you must, you should. Innocuous enough, right? But try this on for size. An associate at work says you need to pay more attention to his project. What does your brain say non-verbally? In most people there's a bit of a rebellion going on. Really? I need to? I don't think so, bucko!
So you run into a friend whose been to a new, hot restaurant which you haven't been to yet. You should go to this place! Feel that? You should go? It almost sets up a "I couldn't care less" attitude. Of course, personalities vary and some people are perfectly comfortable with letting others dictate what they should do. But most of us are independent, self directed people.
So what do we replace these terms with when talking to ourselves (most important, real power shift takes place here, you no longer "need" to do something, you "want" to do something), our children, our employees, our mates (change the terms, change the dynamic, get your way more often), our customers and prospective customers? Simple. Try "you might want to" do something, "you might want to consider" something.
This is especially effective with teenagers and prospects, two groups ready to rebel or play devil's advocate at a moment's notice. "You might want to consider driving a little more carefully or your license might end up in jeopardy or at the very least your insurance might go up." That's friend to friend, not superior to inferior like this: "You need to shape up your driving. You better watch it or you're going to lose your license!" Whole different tone.
And with a prospect, "You need to move to the cloud!" Is just not going to get the same fair hearing that, "You might want to consider exploring the cloud, it might be something of value to you," will. The key is to present for consideration, not try to force something which almost always has a car lot negotiation feel to it. That's why we avoid car lots.
This is not to say that the aforementioned terms are not to be used, not at all. They're perfectly appropriate at times, without question. But when it comes to persuading someone to our point of view, you might want to consider leaving them out of the conversation. And when you do this with yourself, you shift the power from some unseen authority saying you "need" to get up and get to work you're now saying yourself that you "want" to get up and get to work.
Rabu, 27 September 2017
Exaggerate to Practice Your Body Language - Inspired by Daniel Coyle's The Little Book of Talent
Daniel Coyle, the New York Times best-selling author of The Talent Code, has written a fascinating and informative new book, The Little Book of Talent: 52 Tips for Improving Your Skills, which includes simple, practical tips based on examples and research from the world's greatest talent hotbeds.
In his Tip #31 - To Learn a New Move, Exaggerate It, Coyle suggests that "going too far [exaggeration] helps us understand where the boundaries are." The goal is to "go too far so you can feel the outer edges of the move, and then work on building the skill with precision."
Here are 2 ways to "exaggerate it" when practicing your presentation skills:
1. Exaggerate Your Voice
Go through a whole practice of your presentation just focusing on your voice. Speak louder than usual - don't shout, but breathe fully and project your voice. Exaggerate your enunciation, your pausing and your intonation. Over-emphasize the most important words in each sentence and how you vary your voice to communicate emotion and meaning.
2. Exaggerate Your Gestures
Do another round of practice just exaggerating your gestures. Don't focus on your words, slides, voice or anything else - just make big, dramatic, visible gestures that correspond to what you are saying. Use bold gestures to draw pictures for the audience and to illustrate your content.
After you have practiced the exaggeration and have built the skill, dial back the exaggeration and return to a more heightened sense of "normal," a "new normal" where you are able to incorporate powerful and appropriate voice and gestures to add impact to your presentation.
(A different, though also interesting, means of using exaggeration as a practice technique is to record yourself on video during a normal practice session and then play it back without sound, fast forwarding through it so your gestures and movement are exaggerated. In this exercise, you will be observing the exaggeration, rather than experiencing it directly.)
In his Tip #31 - To Learn a New Move, Exaggerate It, Coyle suggests that "going too far [exaggeration] helps us understand where the boundaries are." The goal is to "go too far so you can feel the outer edges of the move, and then work on building the skill with precision."
Here are 2 ways to "exaggerate it" when practicing your presentation skills:
1. Exaggerate Your Voice
Go through a whole practice of your presentation just focusing on your voice. Speak louder than usual - don't shout, but breathe fully and project your voice. Exaggerate your enunciation, your pausing and your intonation. Over-emphasize the most important words in each sentence and how you vary your voice to communicate emotion and meaning.
2. Exaggerate Your Gestures
Do another round of practice just exaggerating your gestures. Don't focus on your words, slides, voice or anything else - just make big, dramatic, visible gestures that correspond to what you are saying. Use bold gestures to draw pictures for the audience and to illustrate your content.
After you have practiced the exaggeration and have built the skill, dial back the exaggeration and return to a more heightened sense of "normal," a "new normal" where you are able to incorporate powerful and appropriate voice and gestures to add impact to your presentation.
(A different, though also interesting, means of using exaggeration as a practice technique is to record yourself on video during a normal practice session and then play it back without sound, fast forwarding through it so your gestures and movement are exaggerated. In this exercise, you will be observing the exaggeration, rather than experiencing it directly.)
Senin, 11 September 2017
What To Do With Your Hands When Public Speaking
Research has demonstrated that in everyday, interpersonal communication, people spontaneously generate images via hand gestures to accompany their speech. In this way they help to encode the speech into the listener's memory by utilizing two cognitive aspects: words and images. Although many of these gestures are made unconsciously certain specific gestures can be isolated and defined. By using specific gestures to accompany your speech, with a little practice you can enhance the physical dimensions of your communications. This creates multi representations of meaning and can really make your message more memorable. There are three types of gestures:
Adapters, Emblems and Illustrators.
'Adapters' are habitual movements that are performed with little or no conscious intent to communicate, for example, touching your hair, fiddling with a watchstrap, or pushing your glasses up the bridge of your nose even when they are perfectly positioned.
'Emblems' are gestures that do not depend on speech, as their meaning is clear and culturally agreed, for example, thumbs up, raising the middle finger, or the OK sign.
'Illustrators' are the category we are interested in and which are essential in effective communication. They are created as part of an intended act of communication and constructed together with speech. However there is no general awareness of a codified meaning - unlike emblems. This is because they can reveal or communicate meanings that speech cannot accommodate.
There are four key illustrators:
1. Iconic: These represent shapes of objects or people and movements of objects and people in space. For example, tracing a square in the air with an index finger while saying, "Have you seen a box anywhere around here?" Or, making a walking motion with two fingers while saying, "I'm just going for a walk"
2. Metaphoric: These are gestures made while explaining something. For example, while answering a mathematical problem an individual may make an arcing or pulsing motion with the hand as they describe the numerical route to an answer. Metaphoric gestures are a visual depiction of a process.
3. Deictic: Pointing at objects, places and people indicating temporal or spatial references are deictic gestures. You may even point at something or someone not visible to the listener, for example, pointing behind you while saying "My mother lives in the next street."
There are also two viewpoints from which gestures narrate:
OBJECTIVE: These gestures describe an event from an observer's point of view and depict the elements in a story as items. For example, describing someone running across a road by using the fingers to depict legs in fast motion. The objects and characters in the story are separate from the narrator.
SUBJECTIVE: The narrator acts out the story using gestures as part of a character performance. For example, describing someone running across a road, the gesturer would move his/her arms as if actually running.
By gesturing as if you were the characters and objects in your story you bring energy and life to the spoken word and create more memorable images in the listener's mind. It is also important to consider the elements you wish to describe during a speech or narration. Why not try consciously gesturing as you speak and explore the effects. Though, perhaps you might start practicing with family and friends before you give an important presentation!
Adapters, Emblems and Illustrators.
'Adapters' are habitual movements that are performed with little or no conscious intent to communicate, for example, touching your hair, fiddling with a watchstrap, or pushing your glasses up the bridge of your nose even when they are perfectly positioned.
'Emblems' are gestures that do not depend on speech, as their meaning is clear and culturally agreed, for example, thumbs up, raising the middle finger, or the OK sign.
'Illustrators' are the category we are interested in and which are essential in effective communication. They are created as part of an intended act of communication and constructed together with speech. However there is no general awareness of a codified meaning - unlike emblems. This is because they can reveal or communicate meanings that speech cannot accommodate.
There are four key illustrators:
1. Iconic: These represent shapes of objects or people and movements of objects and people in space. For example, tracing a square in the air with an index finger while saying, "Have you seen a box anywhere around here?" Or, making a walking motion with two fingers while saying, "I'm just going for a walk"
2. Metaphoric: These are gestures made while explaining something. For example, while answering a mathematical problem an individual may make an arcing or pulsing motion with the hand as they describe the numerical route to an answer. Metaphoric gestures are a visual depiction of a process.
3. Deictic: Pointing at objects, places and people indicating temporal or spatial references are deictic gestures. You may even point at something or someone not visible to the listener, for example, pointing behind you while saying "My mother lives in the next street."
There are also two viewpoints from which gestures narrate:
OBJECTIVE: These gestures describe an event from an observer's point of view and depict the elements in a story as items. For example, describing someone running across a road by using the fingers to depict legs in fast motion. The objects and characters in the story are separate from the narrator.
SUBJECTIVE: The narrator acts out the story using gestures as part of a character performance. For example, describing someone running across a road, the gesturer would move his/her arms as if actually running.
By gesturing as if you were the characters and objects in your story you bring energy and life to the spoken word and create more memorable images in the listener's mind. It is also important to consider the elements you wish to describe during a speech or narration. Why not try consciously gesturing as you speak and explore the effects. Though, perhaps you might start practicing with family and friends before you give an important presentation!
Kamis, 31 Agustus 2017
Finding Resource and Motivational Speakers for Your Event
Keynote speaker set the tone of your event; yours should then be hired after close scrutiny, with criteria based on relevance and ability. Your dilemma is in choosing the speaker that can handle your event's scope and theme. Corporate events focus on a specific theme, often requiring speakers with specializations. You should scout for the cream of the crop, out of the pool of candidates recommended or scouted. The good thing is the variety of options; professional speakers are as versatile as your themes, as well as the size of your audience and the breadth of the topic. Narrow down your options, consider candidates with the right mindset.
Your Event Speaker's Role and Limitations
Remember the role of an event speaker before you pool your options. Event speakers tie up all the loose ends, that is, the expectations of participants and your audience. Keynote speakers are expected to deliver the theme with authority and competency, and if this involves the participation of your audience, a speaker should be able to facilitate group activities as well. Opt for speakers with specializations, if you want focus and efficiency. Unless your event involves an audience with wide variety, the speaker should strike interest with the smallest common denominator. The disadvantage of specialization is it requires a specific audience. The advantage is you're ensured your audience leaves with fresh insight on your event's theme.
Resource Speakers Bank on Authority
Resource speakers bank on their authority, on themes and topics related to their expertise. You can't compromise on your speaker's ability, and he or she should add something new to what's already known, already available, already familiar to your audience. At the outset, your resource speaker should offer fresh perspective on topics, delivered with the confidence that'll answer most of the questions even before you accommodate questions after the speech. Finding a resource speaker isn't much of a challenge if your well-connected; colleagues and sister companies may recommend speakers for repeat or new events.
Motivational Speakers Prep with Discretion
Motivational speakers push participants to action. This calls for charisma on the part of the speaker, and a celebrity status or experience in promotions help. The key to effective public speaking is in listening, and your speaker should first sit down with an attentive ear focused on your objectives, the nature of your organization, the kind of audience you'll accommodate, and the manner of delivery you prefer. Discretion is also crucial to efficiency, and your speaker keep the speech long enough to be substantial, short enough to maximize your audience's interest.
Your Event Speaker's Role and Limitations
Remember the role of an event speaker before you pool your options. Event speakers tie up all the loose ends, that is, the expectations of participants and your audience. Keynote speakers are expected to deliver the theme with authority and competency, and if this involves the participation of your audience, a speaker should be able to facilitate group activities as well. Opt for speakers with specializations, if you want focus and efficiency. Unless your event involves an audience with wide variety, the speaker should strike interest with the smallest common denominator. The disadvantage of specialization is it requires a specific audience. The advantage is you're ensured your audience leaves with fresh insight on your event's theme.
Resource Speakers Bank on Authority
Resource speakers bank on their authority, on themes and topics related to their expertise. You can't compromise on your speaker's ability, and he or she should add something new to what's already known, already available, already familiar to your audience. At the outset, your resource speaker should offer fresh perspective on topics, delivered with the confidence that'll answer most of the questions even before you accommodate questions after the speech. Finding a resource speaker isn't much of a challenge if your well-connected; colleagues and sister companies may recommend speakers for repeat or new events.
Motivational Speakers Prep with Discretion
Motivational speakers push participants to action. This calls for charisma on the part of the speaker, and a celebrity status or experience in promotions help. The key to effective public speaking is in listening, and your speaker should first sit down with an attentive ear focused on your objectives, the nature of your organization, the kind of audience you'll accommodate, and the manner of delivery you prefer. Discretion is also crucial to efficiency, and your speaker keep the speech long enough to be substantial, short enough to maximize your audience's interest.
Selasa, 15 Agustus 2017
Public Speaking: Simple Trick to Underline Your Words and Message
Written and spoken speech are not the same. I can underline a phrase in a written article. I can put an exclamation point after a sentence in a written article! But most speakers simply think their only tool for emphasis is saying a sentence louder. It isn't. Professional speakers use pauses. Say something important and pause while making eye contact with the audience, emphasizes your point. Say it again after the pause and you've drawn a line under it. Say it an expand upon the point and you've driven the point into the audience's memory.
Want even more emphasis? Walk toward your audience reaching out to them then deliver the line and pause making eye contact.
Pauses are extremely powerful. Even a short pause is effective, but a long pause is even more effective. If you doubt that, consider the most memorable speakers you have heard. If Martin Luther King comes to mind, remember the pause after, "I have a dream... " If you remember Kennedy, you will recall his pauses in his speech, "Ich... bin... ein... berliner." Reagan, paused twice, each time after "Mr. Gorbechev" in, "Mr. Gorbechev, open this gate. Mr. Gorbechev, tear down this wall!"
Of contemporary speakers, President Obama is considered an excellent speaker. His primary secret is use of frequent pauses. Pauses, suggest relaxed delivery and confidence and authority. Pauses enhance a cool-ness. Imagine for a moment deliver of any of the President's statements without his characteristic pauses--you imagine a more nervous-looking delivery.
It takes a confident speaker to use pauses. Frequently, nervous speakers fill every second for fear that the audience will quit listening or that the speakers nerves will show in the pause. That's a natural reaction, but the wrong reaction. So clearly this takes a bit of practice. It's easiest to put pauses between ideas (sentences, usually). Try this to practice: Deliver the first line, making eye contact with someone in one portion of the audience. Pause. Then shift your gaze, make eye contact with someone else in a different part of the audience, and deliver your next point. Pause. Then shift again to deliver the next point. You should find this easier and more natural.
Control of the volume of your voice before or after a pause can draw even more attention. Consider President Reagan's, "Mr. Gorbechev, open this gate. Mr. Gorbechev, tear down this wall!" His voice rose in volume as he paused between each of these words.
If you wish to underline your spoken words, if you wish to seem in control, and if you want to make your delivery memorable, then master the fine art of the pause.
Want even more emphasis? Walk toward your audience reaching out to them then deliver the line and pause making eye contact.
Pauses are extremely powerful. Even a short pause is effective, but a long pause is even more effective. If you doubt that, consider the most memorable speakers you have heard. If Martin Luther King comes to mind, remember the pause after, "I have a dream... " If you remember Kennedy, you will recall his pauses in his speech, "Ich... bin... ein... berliner." Reagan, paused twice, each time after "Mr. Gorbechev" in, "Mr. Gorbechev, open this gate. Mr. Gorbechev, tear down this wall!"
Of contemporary speakers, President Obama is considered an excellent speaker. His primary secret is use of frequent pauses. Pauses, suggest relaxed delivery and confidence and authority. Pauses enhance a cool-ness. Imagine for a moment deliver of any of the President's statements without his characteristic pauses--you imagine a more nervous-looking delivery.
It takes a confident speaker to use pauses. Frequently, nervous speakers fill every second for fear that the audience will quit listening or that the speakers nerves will show in the pause. That's a natural reaction, but the wrong reaction. So clearly this takes a bit of practice. It's easiest to put pauses between ideas (sentences, usually). Try this to practice: Deliver the first line, making eye contact with someone in one portion of the audience. Pause. Then shift your gaze, make eye contact with someone else in a different part of the audience, and deliver your next point. Pause. Then shift again to deliver the next point. You should find this easier and more natural.
Control of the volume of your voice before or after a pause can draw even more attention. Consider President Reagan's, "Mr. Gorbechev, open this gate. Mr. Gorbechev, tear down this wall!" His voice rose in volume as he paused between each of these words.
If you wish to underline your spoken words, if you wish to seem in control, and if you want to make your delivery memorable, then master the fine art of the pause.
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